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it feels like the screen actually shakes woahhhhhh
Please don’t tap the glass it frightens the bloggers
back when i was in community college my teacher told us the story of a girl in his class who wanted to have sex with her boyfriend but they didnt have any lube so they used mayonnaise. fast forward a couple of days and she’s getting random orgasms during class and driving places so she goes to the doctor and they check her out and guess what they found
okay ill tell you it was maggots. maggots were in her vagina giving her orgasms.
"And so the little lamb and his mama live happily ever after," the girl finished reading her story aloud to the creature beside her. Hopeful orbs of blue glistened as she cocked her head up at him. "Didya like that, Mister Boogey?"
No response from underneath the black coat. She frowned, teetering off her seat ever so slowly before her tiny feet reached the ground.
"Mister Boogey?" she asked again, gripping the corners of the dark trench coat. When nothing responded, she slowly peeled it open, revealing the coat rack on which he had been perched. Where had he gone?
The little girl shrunk back, upset that her friend had left without a word. She curled up in her chair, clutching the book tightly in case he came back to hear the rest of the tale. Suddenly, a soft wind blew through the empty room, but before she could turn to see what had caused it, she was swept up in darkness.
"Gotcha," the creature chuckled, cradling her close to him.
The child squeal with laughter most contagious, pleased of his return.
"I thought you left!" She gave a pout, looking up at his shadowy face.
"Why, my dear, I’d never leave you. I am your guardian after all, am I not?" The monster gave her a toothy smile. “And I will always be your Boogeyman.”
"this baby came out of you but im not 100% sure its yours"
I MORPHED SHREK AND GOLLUM’S FACE TOGETHER AND I CAN’T STOP LAUGHING
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Oh my god this looks like a hipster post but it’s just the king of hell
not enough hipster galaxy overlay
there we go
Still not hipster enough, we need some profound and meaningless words on this.
Meaningless and profound enough?
Can someone tweet this to Mark…
Oh my god so we have one for Bobby and one for Crowley they’re like hipster husbands
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Fun Story: My director kept telling me and my tenor sax buddy to play softer. No matter what we did, it wasn’t soft enough for him. So getting frustrated, I told my buddy “Dont play this time. Just fake it”
Our Band Director then informed us we sounded perfect.
To my readers: “p” means quiet, “pp” means really quiet. I’ve never seen “pppp” before haha.
On the contrast, “f” means loud, and “ffff” probably means so loud you go unconscious.
I had ffff in a piece once and my conductor told me to play as loudly as physically possible without falling off my chair…
Me and my trombone buddies had “ffff” and he sat next to me and played so hard that he fell out of his chair.
The lengths we go for music.
Okay yeah so I play the bass clarinet and the amount of air you have to move and the stiffness of the reed means it only has two settings and that is loud and louder, with an optional LOUDEST that includes a 50% probability of HORRIBLE CROAKING NOISE which is the bass equivalent of the ubiquitous clarinet shriek.
One day, when I was in concert band in high school, we got a new piece handed out for the first time, and there was a strange little commotion back in the tuba section — whispering, and pointing at something in the music, and swatting at each other’s hands all shhh don’t call attention to it. And although they did attract the attention of basically everyone else in the band, they managed to avoid being noticed by the band director, who gave us a few minutes to look over our parts and then said, “All right, let’s run through it up to section A.”
And here we are, cheerfully playing along, sounding reasonably competent — but everyone, when they have the attention to spare, is keeping an eye on the tuba players. They don’t come in for the first eight measures or so, and then when they do come in, what we see is:
[reeeeeeally deep breath]
[COLOSSAL FOGHORN NOISE]
The entire band stops dead, in the cacophonous kind of way that a band stops when it hasn’t actually been cued to stop. The band director doesn’t even say anything, just looks straight back at the tubas and makes a helpless sort of why gesture.
In unison, the tuba players defend themselves: “THERE WERE FOUR F’S.”
FFFF is not really a rational dynamic marking for any instrument, but for the love of all that is holy why would you put it in a tuba part.
This is the best band post
Everyone else go home
Oh man, so I play trombone, and we got this piece called Florentiner Marsch by Julius Fucik, and we saw this
which is 8 fortes. We were shocked until,
that is 24 fortes who the fuck does that
Who does that?
This guy. Take a good look - that is the moustache of a man with nothing to lose.
More like Julius Fuckit
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